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Your Mind and Womb Connection: Trying to Conceive

April 25, 2024 . dija

Written by Matilda Rosengren, Mind and Womb

Our relations to our period come in all shapes and forms, but I never thought having my period could bring up this many feelings and emotions as when I was trying to conceive. How something so natural and normal could feel so wrong and like a big failure.  

There it was again, the bloody confirmation that I was not pregnant. A feeling of sinking, of sinking into darkness. All the plans I secretly made for what could have been. Already knowing exactly when the possible due date would have been. Picturing all the details in my mind. Telling myself every month that I was not going to do that again, but how do you stay positive and hopeful without doing exactly that? I know I couldn’t.  

Another month of grieving the loss of something I never actually had, grieving the idea and the hope I had built. The hope that this would have been the month. It was only a few days earlier I had convinced myself that the symptoms I had felt were not only PMS this time. The sore breast was for sure a bit extra sore and I did indeed pee a few more times than I normally do. Yet there it was again, the bloody confirmation that I wasn’t pregnant. The fact that premenstrual symptoms often are the same as those during the start of pregnancy, I thought, seemed like a cruel joke at the time (thank you progesterone hormones). Did I make it all up in my head or were my breasts simply more sore because I kept on squeezing them? Did I perhaps pee a few more times because I had been better at drinking more water than normally? Probably a little bit of both. I think this very well highlights how all-consuming TTC can be. Where every little thing gets noted and analysed, and yes, even how often you go to the toilet gets tracked.  

For a long time, each arrival of my period felt like I lost another piece of myself. The remaining was a shell of a body, a body that belonged in an IVF lab for doctors to poke and prod. A feeling I now have learned is very common among many women and yet we walk around with it in silence.   

As a yoga teacher, I started to deep dive into how I could work on the mind and womb connection, how I could start trusting and loving my body again. It was not an easy journey, but I came to the realisation that I wished more women had access to all that is available. For example, using holistic tools such as yoga, meditation, and womb massage can support our bodies and minds while we try to conceive. A way to strengthen the connection between your mind and womb, and move your body in a way that will nurture it and support your fertility. That is how the idea for my passion project Mind and Womb was born. Mind and Womb is an online holistic health platform for all women trying to conceive, no matter where you are in your fertility journey. Our teachers and holistic health practitioners, who all have their own knowledge of female health, provide you with different classes that will support your body and mind, no matter where you are in your cycle. I truly hope that Mind and Womb will help many women both to become pregnant, and to remember the journey of trying to conceive as something beautiful, something they can look back on and feel joy over. I therefore wish that fertility health becomes as normalised and practiced as pregnancy health. 

Are you in the midst of TTC right now? What I learned over time was that it was ok to let yourself feel all the feelings. It does not matter if it’s your first or thirty-sixth month of trying, you are always allowed to grieve the life that could have been. After you have let yourself grieve and feel it all, try to remember that the start of your bleeding also means a new beginning, a new possibility. Connecting your mind and womb. You got this!  
 
For one month, Mind and Womb are offering a free online class designed to support you through the menstrual phase of your cycle.  

Best wishes, 

Matilda, Mind and Womb  

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